The Difference Between Knowing What To Do vs Doing It

It is significant and important when parents take these simple principles, put them into practice and get results that years of therapyKnowing vs Doing and lots of $$$ have not done. One mom's experience of 'having it in her head but not being able to get it into practice' is a challenge we all face. It is the difference between 'knowing and doing' knowledge and wisdom and ultimately success and failure. Although familiar to many of us, this short story can offer hope and encouragement to those of us who know what to do, but are still having trouble doing it.

I'm learning that if I do not react in a negative way, they usually turn around and do what I've asked. I have to work on it because I hate being told no. Lol. And no is the primary response. But if I can see past that, it resolves itself. My old mindset was to be offended by the feeling of being disrespected. But now the feeling of them figuring it out and doing it without me yelling is wonderful. They actually choose to do it. That feels way more like respect than me trying to force it and the blood pressure stays even too which is a huge benefit.I could never have got this far without you guys! You guys and the grace of God. I had it in my head but couldn't get it into practice. My reactionary feelings would jump out of my mouth. Lol but it's getting better. It's about time since my oldest is now in college! I think my biggest accomplishment is that now when I get mad at them, I can stop and not walk away myself and feel defeated. I can wait a minute and then they come in for a hug which is huge for us because in the old days they would be mad, I would be mad and we'd go in separate directions me yelling and them talking back. I'd feel disrespected and unheard and their anger or fear would escalate as well. It would set the tune for the evening. Now I can immediately let it go and be present while they come in for the hug. It's the greatest blessing in the world."

As parents, we need some 'skin in game'. Our actions, our willingness to lay down centuries of traditional old paradigm practices is what propels our way through the murkiness, the darkness, and hopelessness that things will never change, never get any better and the past will just continue to repeat itself. You know better. You may need to "just do it".

Yoda bwTo paraphrase Master Yoda,
"Do or do not, but do not just know. For that is mere knowledge. The wisdom is in the doing".


  1. It is at the level of the mind that this difference between knowing the good and doing the good happens.

Leave a Reply