Get Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable

Breath-ButtonGet comfortable with being uncomfortable. As parents, our job is to help gently access suppressed emotions, both in our children and ourselves. In general, these are emotions that we ordinarily prefer not to acknowledge. The intent here is to deliberately allow this to occur because these suppressed emotions are the unconscious triggers that cause behaviors and circumstances that are not in our best interests. This means, get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

Our desire to manipulate or change our children’s behaviors so that we feel more comfortable comes from our inability to just show up and enjoy the wonder of whatever happens exactly as it is. How we interact with what is happening in each moment sows the seeds for what is to come. The quality of those seeds depends upon whether we react or respond.

Michael Brown, is his book The Presence Process, clarifies the difference between reacting and responding. He says,” reacting to our Presence Process bookexperiences means we make decisions based on what we believe happened yesterday and what we think may happen tomorrow. In contrast, we respond to our experiences when we make choices based on what’s happening right here, right now. This response draws on the wisdom we derive from past experience, whereas reactivity is driven by the unresolved trauma that’s embedded in us. Once we integrate the energetic patterns that underlie our behavior and beliefs, It’s possible to respond to all our experiences rather than reacting”.

Although this is something we all must do for ourselves, by being role models for our children in this way also enhances our ability to go deeply into the trauma and pain that our children have experienced so that we no longer are bound by our own fears and concerns. As I have said, you cannot take your children where you have not gone yourself in pursuing uncomfortable suppressed emotional states. So the more we can just be, the more our children will be able to "just be". When there is no longer a need to communicate through behaviors, there are no unwanted behaviors – those that no longer serve the greatest good. Your children know this.

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