Eight Components of a Peaceful Parent/Child Relationship Pt 3: Acceptance

P.E.A.C.E.F.U.L: Eight Components of a Peaceful Parent/Child Relationship Component #3 Acceptance is the unconditional love that lies beneath the essential lifelong commitment a parent makes to her child. It is vital to the child’s Acceptancehealthy survival in the world. This level of commitment communicates to your child, “No matter what may happen in life, you are okay with me, and for this reason, I accept you as you are.”

When a child receives this core message, she will carry this as a stepping-stone into all areas throughout the rest of her life. We all have a need to be accepted, to belong, to feel a part, to be invited into a group with values and beliefs that coincide with those that resonate deep within our beings.

Whether it is a group of friends, the human race, a community, or a family; being accepted is a means of defining ourselves. Many children, unfortunately, do not have this deep sense of acceptance to fall back on during the struggles of life. These children live with a deep belief that they are inadequate, not accepted, and unable to be valued and loved.

The result is a life of constant self-doubt and low self-worth. Such children grow up and become adults who try to find their self-worth in others, always looking to others or their work or their money for approval.

Acceptance between a parent and child is the unspoken agreement that within their relationship that all is okay for now and forever. When difficult times come, as surely they will, this child knows that she can always return to her parent for security and acceptance. My colleague Pat O'Brien, founder of the very successful adopting older teens program in NYC - www.yougottabelieve.org,  came up with this beautiful little prayer that pretty much says it better than I.

"May you love me the most, when I deserve it the least, because that is when I need it the most."

Choose Acceptance,

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You have permission to copy this and circulate to as many people as you think can benefit. Help to bring peace on earth and good parenting toward all children.

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